Less than a month left for home… I guess… I am not sure. As the time for going home gets closer, all these things that I have not think about, but things that make me anxious, began to pop up in my mind again… These are mostly things concerning teaching, etc… I want to teach if there is demand for my teaching, for ashtanga Vinyasa yoga; otherwise, I do not claim anything. I want to teach in exchange for something and I want to teach to people who want to learn ashtanga yoga, so to people who can commit at least 3 mornings a week. I am manifesting my desire and I guess the rest is up to the universe.
What else? Ihimmm It is still nice here. Irena and Marco got married last Friday in a Hindi temple. It was lovely! Also Arne, Mau and Barbara came all the way for the wedding! I kept saying “if I ever get married, I want it to be like this with a nice ceremony, with great friends and Rolf and Marci, just like a family”. My camera broke but I got photos from all these people who were taking photos. Towards the end of the ceremony, I realized how much my life changed, how magical this is all. 3-4 years back, I could not imagine being in India, being with all these people who entered my life recently and became like family, sharing these precious moments… Some getting married, others getting engaged, another getting pregnant (!) … Life works in wondrous ways. Ahh, so now I realize how insignificant all those things that occupies my mind and causes me to loose sleep ☺
Tomorrow we are back to 6 AM practice from 5AM! I am still working on jumping and trying to keep a light attitude. It will happen some time. Ohh and there will be pranayama class on Saturday! At last I will learn, I have been waiting for a Pranayama class since last year, they were happing always when I was away, I guess it is time for me to learn now!
I had also been having Yoga-Rolf dreams over the weekend; one on Friday night, one on Saturday morning. In the first one, at the end of my practice he was telling me to do pranayama. He told me to do the first 3 and then he was explaining the first one which I cannot really remember now. In the second dream, he was helping me with Kapotasana and he had me put my knees very close to one another, almost together and then he was telling me to lift more from the upper back and also from lower back… I am waiting for Basakana B dream, maybe I can learn in my dream ☺
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Candolim, practice...
I moved to Candolim on Saturday. Now I have my own little room with its kitchen, all I need is in this little studio apartment! It is by the beach, 2 min to the shala and 5 min to the beach. I have a old French couple as neighbors until the 12th of this month. They say they have been coming to this place for many years but maybe next time it is time to go somewhere else since Goa got so populated with tourists, the roads and the beaches are full, the pollution has been increasing, not the same simple Goa… For me, it was such a difference Monday morning to go to the practice without making the cold drive. My body was warm, I did not even need socks whereas before every morning after the drive I would be rubbing my body to warm up and it would take an effort to get off my socks and my pullover…. Therefore, I am quite happy with my move. I can also be at the beach for the sunsets…
What else, oohhh Seyfi from London came! I was so happy when I saw him yesterday morning! We used to practice together at the Yoga Place in London; we became friends through the practice… Yes, he was one of those very nice people I used to practice with. Well, I am lucky to meet him again. Yoga Place has a really nice Mysore group. It had when I was there and I guess it is still does because I met Nigel, who also practices in YP, here, not when I was in London (he was not coming to practice when I was there) and he turned out to be a great person as well… So I keep missing YP, and of course it has a special meaning for me, it is the place where I got deep into Ashtanga, it is the place where I felt that yoga is the thing that I enjoy the most in my life, it is place where I decided to change my plans, leave everything behind and pick up and come to India...
So, a new week begin, this is my last month… I might add one more week to practice here or I might go to Pune for my last week in India… I was thinking no Pune this year but I guess I am missing the ashram, I missing the meditations, the gardens, the Buddha grove… I will see what I decide. You never know in India, plans change very quickly, unexpectedly. On the other hand, I am working on my practice and even harder than before, I added double chaturangas to my sun salutations, which Rolf has been suggesting since last April to get me stronger and now I do them finally. Still I am stuck where I am, at the same point Bakasana B, and I have to realize (knowing is not enough ☺) that it is okey; I am doing my work: double chaturangas and also working on jumping into handstands with Marci, so the rest will happen when it is time! I came so far in such a short time and I can be stuck, there is no goal, there is nothing to be achieved, only freedom, lets not make one more obsession… just work on it and then leave it, just have fun and then move into the daily life, just look at it as a blessing which is giving me the right perspective about the practice and myself and others.
What else, oohhh Seyfi from London came! I was so happy when I saw him yesterday morning! We used to practice together at the Yoga Place in London; we became friends through the practice… Yes, he was one of those very nice people I used to practice with. Well, I am lucky to meet him again. Yoga Place has a really nice Mysore group. It had when I was there and I guess it is still does because I met Nigel, who also practices in YP, here, not when I was in London (he was not coming to practice when I was there) and he turned out to be a great person as well… So I keep missing YP, and of course it has a special meaning for me, it is the place where I got deep into Ashtanga, it is the place where I felt that yoga is the thing that I enjoy the most in my life, it is place where I decided to change my plans, leave everything behind and pick up and come to India...
So, a new week begin, this is my last month… I might add one more week to practice here or I might go to Pune for my last week in India… I was thinking no Pune this year but I guess I am missing the ashram, I missing the meditations, the gardens, the Buddha grove… I will see what I decide. You never know in India, plans change very quickly, unexpectedly. On the other hand, I am working on my practice and even harder than before, I added double chaturangas to my sun salutations, which Rolf has been suggesting since last April to get me stronger and now I do them finally. Still I am stuck where I am, at the same point Bakasana B, and I have to realize (knowing is not enough ☺) that it is okey; I am doing my work: double chaturangas and also working on jumping into handstands with Marci, so the rest will happen when it is time! I came so far in such a short time and I can be stuck, there is no goal, there is nothing to be achieved, only freedom, lets not make one more obsession… just work on it and then leave it, just have fun and then move into the daily life, just look at it as a blessing which is giving me the right perspective about the practice and myself and others.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
What is going in Goa...
In Goa, I seem to neglect writing much more than usual… all the distractions such as beach, good food, meeting with friends…
So, where were we? Ohh I am still and yes, still working on Bakasana B. Now I accept the fact that I am stuck and it is all right. With handstands, I am taking a break, although, today Rolf asked me “Maya, are you finished? No handstands? Tired? I am also tired today…” Actually, yes, I was tired this morning more than usual and I am still tired… I donnu if it is waking up so early to began practice at 5AM or if it is that I am not taking care of myself properly... Last night, I went to bed at 8PM; still, this morning I was tired and dizzy… It is also a bit cold at 5AM, so it is taking time to warm up and stay warm. Also, my back is not feeling well, I have some pain, mainly on my left side. I will see the acupuncturist lady on Friday. I think she will be able to help.
Anyhow… I am fine with being stuck at Bakasana B, but that does not mean I am giving up. I will get it at some point. I know it is mostly fear… need to work it through and will… it might take some time, which is okey. It is like backdrops; I was so scared when I first began practicing them couple of years ago that I would go almost all the way down but just before dropping I would come up… but now I do them all right…
What else… The Ayurveda course with Gangotri… It is going very well. She is a very good teacher, a great source of information. We are enjoying it a lot. She just finished talking about Vata yesterday. I guess I am Vata dominant. Lets see what the others are like, then, I think I will have a better idea. She will also talk about life style we should follow. She has already been giving good tips such as need for waking up before sunrise because with the sunrise our manupura chakra begins working, and it starts turning the toxins in our body; therefore, we need to get up before sunrise and clean our body…
So, where were we? Ohh I am still and yes, still working on Bakasana B. Now I accept the fact that I am stuck and it is all right. With handstands, I am taking a break, although, today Rolf asked me “Maya, are you finished? No handstands? Tired? I am also tired today…” Actually, yes, I was tired this morning more than usual and I am still tired… I donnu if it is waking up so early to began practice at 5AM or if it is that I am not taking care of myself properly... Last night, I went to bed at 8PM; still, this morning I was tired and dizzy… It is also a bit cold at 5AM, so it is taking time to warm up and stay warm. Also, my back is not feeling well, I have some pain, mainly on my left side. I will see the acupuncturist lady on Friday. I think she will be able to help.
Anyhow… I am fine with being stuck at Bakasana B, but that does not mean I am giving up. I will get it at some point. I know it is mostly fear… need to work it through and will… it might take some time, which is okey. It is like backdrops; I was so scared when I first began practicing them couple of years ago that I would go almost all the way down but just before dropping I would come up… but now I do them all right…
What else… The Ayurveda course with Gangotri… It is going very well. She is a very good teacher, a great source of information. We are enjoying it a lot. She just finished talking about Vata yesterday. I guess I am Vata dominant. Lets see what the others are like, then, I think I will have a better idea. She will also talk about life style we should follow. She has already been giving good tips such as need for waking up before sunrise because with the sunrise our manupura chakra begins working, and it starts turning the toxins in our body; therefore, we need to get up before sunrise and clean our body…
Friday, December 19, 2008
Friends...
Today two of my great friends from last year arrived, Irena and Marco. I was so lightened up when I saw them during practice early morning. After practice, we met at German Bakery. It was great to reconnect… To tell the truth, I realized how much I miss people from last December… After Nigel left, I felt a bit lonely, a bit disconnected… But now that Irena and Marco came, I felt lively again and then I realized that the connection between the people I met last December is going a long way… Yes, I was lucky to meet all these friends, very lucky.
We decided to do a drop-in to Ganga’s Pranamaya & Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra’s class. It was actually very good. I really enjoy listening to Ganga, he is a very natural teacher, speaker… I kind of begin thinking about going to their ashram up at North. Now I will take his sister’s Ayurveda course, which will begin in few days. I think I will benefit a lot from her course for my health…
We decided to do a drop-in to Ganga’s Pranamaya & Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra’s class. It was actually very good. I really enjoy listening to Ganga, he is a very natural teacher, speaker… I kind of begin thinking about going to their ashram up at North. Now I will take his sister’s Ayurveda course, which will begin in few days. I think I will benefit a lot from her course for my health…
Monday, December 15, 2008
Got a complain?
I need someone who can also listen to me bitching and moaning about stuff… and then just cheer me up with the silliness of my trivial misery. That would be a friend but I mean a real friend. I am now having tough time with my practice because I am stuck with where I am… it has been a year and I am stuck and I am impatient, and yes you can call me a bitch, you can think I am no fun… I am probably all of that… but this is how I feel, and this is what I go through… I am not hiding it, I am living it and I am trying to deal with it… but it is pretty out there, sometimes on my face, sometimes in my words.
You might wonder why so much thinking about the practice? Well, it is the mind… I was listening Osho this morning and he was explaining how we destroy things for ourselves… he was particularly talking about meditation. To paraphrase him: “In the beginning there are sudden glimpses but once you know certain experiences, these glimpses of meditation disappear… for the first time, it happened because you were not expecting; for the first time you had the glimpses, you were innocent, child like. But after the first time, the mind begins calculating searching for the same experience… the mind is bringing misery and if you insist that you must have the same experience again, you will loose it forever, unless you forget it completely that somewhere in the past it happened. For the possibility to open, you need to forget. This is madness, you destroy everything, what comes to your hands you destroy. Life gives you many gifts… life does not give you anything less… but you destroy it… if meditation happens to you, just be grateful, and forget it. It has been a gift, you do not have the capacity to have it, it has been a gift, an overflowing of the divine. Don’t expect it, don’t demand, it will come next day again, it will grow, it will get deeper, it will be infinite. But your mind has to be dropped, your mind is madness…”
Well, it is similar with the practice also. In the beginning, I had no expectations, I was just doing for the joy of it… some postures would seem crazy, I would say "no way I can do this!" and laugh about it, but I would try for that day and then the coming and so on and then few weeks later I would see them coming, happening and I would be so surprised, happily surprised. However, now I am expecting myself to achieve this and that and move forward… I want the beginners mind back! I want to forget those crazy poses I cannot do now has to be achieved… Now, I know they can be achieved, I keep putting pressure on myself and then getting disappointed… the misery creating mind, got a drop it!
You might wonder why so much thinking about the practice? Well, it is the mind… I was listening Osho this morning and he was explaining how we destroy things for ourselves… he was particularly talking about meditation. To paraphrase him: “In the beginning there are sudden glimpses but once you know certain experiences, these glimpses of meditation disappear… for the first time, it happened because you were not expecting; for the first time you had the glimpses, you were innocent, child like. But after the first time, the mind begins calculating searching for the same experience… the mind is bringing misery and if you insist that you must have the same experience again, you will loose it forever, unless you forget it completely that somewhere in the past it happened. For the possibility to open, you need to forget. This is madness, you destroy everything, what comes to your hands you destroy. Life gives you many gifts… life does not give you anything less… but you destroy it… if meditation happens to you, just be grateful, and forget it. It has been a gift, you do not have the capacity to have it, it has been a gift, an overflowing of the divine. Don’t expect it, don’t demand, it will come next day again, it will grow, it will get deeper, it will be infinite. But your mind has to be dropped, your mind is madness…”
Well, it is similar with the practice also. In the beginning, I had no expectations, I was just doing for the joy of it… some postures would seem crazy, I would say "no way I can do this!" and laugh about it, but I would try for that day and then the coming and so on and then few weeks later I would see them coming, happening and I would be so surprised, happily surprised. However, now I am expecting myself to achieve this and that and move forward… I want the beginners mind back! I want to forget those crazy poses I cannot do now has to be achieved… Now, I know they can be achieved, I keep putting pressure on myself and then getting disappointed… the misery creating mind, got a drop it!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Practice, Ink and all
My fourth week ended… Today is a full moon day so no practice. Nigel is leaving this morning. Last night we all, yes we all, including Rolf and Marci, went to Bean me Up to have good food! What else, ohh by the way just before the dinner, I got inked!!! ☺ Yeah something I thought I would never do in India… but I met this couple, and had a very good feeling from them… so I got my last tattoo. It is again with flowers, cherry blossoms… My housemate Kate came with me, which was very nice, it is always good to have a friend with you when you are getting inked… Now, it has to heal quickly, very quickly until Monday (little ambitious there ☺) NO beach for a while. If I had my camera working I would take a photo of my new ink for your eyse but my camera has not been working since I got to Goa…
On the other hand, practice this week was fine, but handstands are still giving me grief and Bakasana B is still not there… But still, Rolf told me that next Monday I can continue up till where I was last April, which is Eka Pada Sirsana . When he told me that I said “ But Bakasana B is still not coming”, he replied “Bakasana A is much better, you have been working hard, and we will continue work on Bakasana B.”
With the housing situation… I found a place in Candolim, which is 3 min. to the shala, 5 min. to the beach, starting from January 3rd. It is kind of perfect wince I could not just walk out from the house that I am living in, it will be nice to find someone to take my room before I move… by the way, I am enjoying my roommates a lot as time passes but still I will love to be by the beach and not driving before practice and when my sister comes to visit I will already have the kind of place I wanted to get for us when she comes to visit me.
By the way, my housemate Kate also designs yoga clothes and the other night we had her show the stock she has with her and I went a bit crazy and bought 4 tops from her! I have been eying the tops she wears for practice, I really liked them. So now I have too many yoga tops, and I have no regrets since they are made from nice material and very original designs!!!
Today, I am planning to spent most of the day at home to not get dust and dirt to my tattoo… But tonight there is a concert at Purple Valley and most of us will go for it. Next Monday, Ganga’s course will begin, still I am not sure about taking or not taking it…
On the other hand, practice this week was fine, but handstands are still giving me grief and Bakasana B is still not there… But still, Rolf told me that next Monday I can continue up till where I was last April, which is
With the housing situation… I found a place in Candolim, which is 3 min. to the shala, 5 min. to the beach, starting from January 3rd. It is kind of perfect wince I could not just walk out from the house that I am living in, it will be nice to find someone to take my room before I move… by the way, I am enjoying my roommates a lot as time passes but still I will love to be by the beach and not driving before practice and when my sister comes to visit I will already have the kind of place I wanted to get for us when she comes to visit me.
By the way, my housemate Kate also designs yoga clothes and the other night we had her show the stock she has with her and I went a bit crazy and bought 4 tops from her! I have been eying the tops she wears for practice, I really liked them. So now I have too many yoga tops, and I have no regrets since they are made from nice material and very original designs!!!
Today, I am planning to spent most of the day at home to not get dust and dirt to my tattoo… But tonight there is a concert at Purple Valley and most of us will go for it. Next Monday, Ganga’s course will begin, still I am not sure about taking or not taking it…
Monday, December 08, 2008
Vrittis
It has been already 3 weeks since I came to Goa. Practice with Rolf and Marci is intense, very good… I feel like there is so much more to do, to learn… and I am lucky to be here…
I am staying in Arpora with 3 other yoga students… It is a nice house but as the winter comes, the ride to practice in the mornings are freezing us. And of course, also the shala is a bit chilly because it is open air rooftop. This morning I did many many sun salutations to warm up after the freezing drive. And then, by the end of the practice, I kept beating myself up because I feel like I am not making progress, still cannot jump into bakasana b and then hand stands are a disaster… I was pretty upset with myself this morning but this is not the way to go, is it? I do what I can do and then I have to let go… let go ... let go… I think the most important lesson for me to learn is letting go… Actually, the practice was good, why I cannot see this and be content… the mind keeps comparing and that is one of the most dangerous poisons… I see it clearly…
And then I am thinking, desiring to move to Candolim where the shala is. I want to be by the beach and be able to walk to the shala instead of driving… I hope to find a peaceful solution and this occupies my mind a lot these days. Wish me good luck.
I am staying in Arpora with 3 other yoga students… It is a nice house but as the winter comes, the ride to practice in the mornings are freezing us. And of course, also the shala is a bit chilly because it is open air rooftop. This morning I did many many sun salutations to warm up after the freezing drive. And then, by the end of the practice, I kept beating myself up because I feel like I am not making progress, still cannot jump into bakasana b and then hand stands are a disaster… I was pretty upset with myself this morning but this is not the way to go, is it? I do what I can do and then I have to let go… let go ... let go… I think the most important lesson for me to learn is letting go… Actually, the practice was good, why I cannot see this and be content… the mind keeps comparing and that is one of the most dangerous poisons… I see it clearly…
And then I am thinking, desiring to move to Candolim where the shala is. I want to be by the beach and be able to walk to the shala instead of driving… I hope to find a peaceful solution and this occupies my mind a lot these days. Wish me good luck.
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Earlier written Goa entiries
I did not have any internet access through my computer for a while... so I am posting the entries I have written earlier just now!
November 25 2008
Sunday, some of us went to Brahmani yoga for self-practice since R&M do not teach on Sundays. It was very nice, the teacher who was teaching had good adjustments and also, Ken the Rolfer began helping her after he finished his own practice and of course he has very good adjustments! After the practice we all went to German bakery. It was great; I was craving to eat there for a week. I love the food there. Afterwards some of us went to Shore Bar (the posh beach shack). I went into the ocean for a long while. Then head home, because I was expecting my friend Dagmar to arrive from the Shvananda ashram in Kerala. As soon as Dagmar arrived I arranged a scooter for her; that is a must especially since we are in Arpora, 15 min. drive to the shala, and one needs a scooter to get around Goa anyways. So, we went to Vagator to pick up the scooter and then stopped by the Juice Bar.
Monday, practice was good and I began working on handstands again, that is not so good, well what I mean is that it is not going so well. I just lost my handstands at some point while in Istanbul, and now they feel impossible. I used to be able to go up by kicking one leg and even with both sides right and left but then they are all gone now. I was struggling to go up with two feet together and now I am struggling to go up with one leg kicking up… so I am steps backwards somehow. I do not know what is the reason for this but will work on it as long as I need to…
November 21 2008
It has been a week since I got to Goa. My train journey was longggg… I am glad I made it but I would not do it again, I think… at least, not the Bangalore-Hubli- Vasco Da Gama route… that was too long and a hassle to shlap my stuff around from bus to train to another train to a bus again and to another bus and to taxi…. I guess it is a bit difficult to do a train journey when you are alone and have bit mush stuff with you. Do not misunderstand, this time I am traveling much lighter but I have got my computer… and that is a big responsibility and also a bit of weight to carry on my back… Well, I made it all right. The ride from Mysore to Bangalore was good since I was with Elena who did not stop talking for the rest of the journey and of course, I did not stop talking either ☺ Yes that was pretty easy and fun ride in a tin can. And when we got to Bangalore for 83 rupees each, Elena put me on this van for 6 rupees, which got me close to the train station. Well, I had to shlap my stuff for a while on the road then up and down the stairs… hardly made it to train on time… that was not much fun. I hardly found where the train was. There was a info boot and when I asked the lady she snapped me for being far from her (could not hear me) and then she wrote on my paper ticket some numbers which I thought were the platform numbers… As I tried to find that platform the newsstand guy said “to Hubli, you got go to platform 8, this number is train number” and luckily I believed him and found the train and on the way, I also realized that train number was some other number written on the ticket and those numbers she wrote were seat numbers which did not matter because you just sit on a seat you find… so, thanks to the newsstand guy, I found my way. The train arrived and everyone rushed to the train as people tried to get out of it. I made my way while being pushed around by Indian women… did not see any Westerners really. While I was moving along the train to find a seat and pulling my duffle back, the man behind me began yelling at me, he was frustrated about my bag. I said what can I do I move as the people in front of me move, he yelled more and I yelled back that I cannot fly the bag over my head…. Then, magically, I saw a seat, there was an older lady and a younger man, and the younger man told me that I can sit. So, as I tried to settle down, the man who was yelling at me come over to the same seat area. I mumbled in Turkish if he could not find any other seat but apparently the younger man who told me I can sit with them was his son. And in a minute both of us mellowed down as if it was not us who were yelling at each other a minute ago. He translated his wife’s question to me and on…. Then a young couple also joined us… The view from the train while there was day light was very green…. Half way through, the son, the wife and the man got of and I felt sorry that they left (figure that out, it only happens in India… ). The young couple was shy but later on, the young man talked to me a little bit, he told me that the young woman is his brother’s wife, they are from Bangalore going somewhere which is before Hubli… Again I felt bad because it was getting dark and the train was getting deserted with less and less women and I did not want to loose my companions. So, they also got off at some point. I was getting sleepy, there were only men around me. One man sat across from me, he was okay, just glued to his cell phone. For almost two hours, he kept dialing numbers and talked on his cell phone about the same issue, I just got that he was concerned about some fax number. It looked a bit overwhelming. It was either a very important matter or he just could not sit without doing nothing.
When we arrived to Hubli it was 10PM. I got off the train, there were only passengers around… but I was determined to find a person who works there and I did. I asked about the sleeper train to Goa. He checked my ticket and told me to stay with him and then he put me to my vagon. That was very very nice of him, otherwise; I was a bit clueless… The sleeper train was okey. Ther were couple of Westerners this time. They gave us a sheet, a blanket and a pillow. I just got the sheet to put under me.
When we arrived to Vasco Da Gama, it was very early morning. I wanted to get the bus to Panaji. There were taxi drivers trying to trick me to take a taxi, telling me bus stand is far away… But I just got grumpy with them and walked straight ahead… After all this way, I was not going to give up here, I was determined to take the bus… and the busses were not so far. It was a nice ride, it was bright morning, and I could feel the difference of Goa air, and Goans already. The bus journey from Vasco Da Gama to Panaji was 16-17 rupees. The ride was surprisingly not long at all. Then I decided that I can make it to Mapsa with the bus again, I could not give up there… So, I got another bus to Mapsa which was 8 rupees but I could not get my change for 10 rupees but would not complain… We were in Mapsa at no time. When I arrived to Mapsa it was time for a taxi. One man offered me to take me with motorbike, I was almost gonna run after him since I was so tired and what was he thinking? Me, my heavy backpack and duffle back behind him on a motor bike? Then I saw a taxi driver I said to Arpora and asked how much, he said 400 rupees I said I am no tourist, I will pay 150 rupees. Of course he refused but another one jumped front and took me to Arpora for 150 rupees!
I arrived to Queenie’s place. The house Alex got for us for this season is a very nice 3 bedroom house right next to Queenie’s house. The living room is big and there is a very nice kitchen. Bedrooms are upstairs, two of them open to a huge balcony… not mine. However, we are a bit far from the shala. It is about 15 minute ride. In the beginning I freaked a bit because of the drive but now I seemed to be getting used to driving. There are also nice places in Candolim, and I guess next time, I will stay over there by the beach. Candolim is very nice, peaceful. The beach is clean and quiet. The new shala is very nice. We are at the roof top, we began when it is dark and while were still doing the standing postures, the daylight takes over. Both Rolf and Marci are in very good mood. I am blessed!
November 14 2008
This morning was the last class in the shala this year… Yesterday was full moon so there was no practice but we carried on with the acroyoga-thai/Mysore massage course (I don’t know what to call it anymore ☺ ). It was a good class, we did the partner yoga sequence we learned but Donna and I were not much into flying so we did not do any of that and then it was the massage part. Fort the massage, we used the feet mainly. Yesterday, it was my turn to give a massage and since we did not have any practice in the morning, I had energy so it was nice to be giving massage. It was also Wayne’s birthday, and at the end, we had ragi ball feast, which are apparently Wayne’s favorite food! Ragi balls are made from finger millet (ragi is finger millet), they are brown dumplings and not so small in size and they are mushy in texture, which I really liked. As we are told, some people feel like they will choke while eating them because of this mushy texture but for me, it was baby/comfort food. They are served with garlicky tomato sauce and coconut chutney; otherwise, by themselves, they are very plain. Nutritional wise, they are high in protein and low in fat. Wayne told us that Guruji used to tell them ragi balls make you strong. Ohh also they are special to state of Karnataka… Well, I discovered them at the last minute, but the next time I am here, I will be eating a lot of them ☺!
This morning, I woke up before 3AM. The anxiety of traveling woke me up. TH practice was nice. Sharat was a bit more
November 25 2008
Sunday, some of us went to Brahmani yoga for self-practice since R&M do not teach on Sundays. It was very nice, the teacher who was teaching had good adjustments and also, Ken the Rolfer began helping her after he finished his own practice and of course he has very good adjustments! After the practice we all went to German bakery. It was great; I was craving to eat there for a week. I love the food there. Afterwards some of us went to Shore Bar (the posh beach shack). I went into the ocean for a long while. Then head home, because I was expecting my friend Dagmar to arrive from the Shvananda ashram in Kerala. As soon as Dagmar arrived I arranged a scooter for her; that is a must especially since we are in Arpora, 15 min. drive to the shala, and one needs a scooter to get around Goa anyways. So, we went to Vagator to pick up the scooter and then stopped by the Juice Bar.
Monday, practice was good and I began working on handstands again, that is not so good, well what I mean is that it is not going so well. I just lost my handstands at some point while in Istanbul, and now they feel impossible. I used to be able to go up by kicking one leg and even with both sides right and left but then they are all gone now. I was struggling to go up with two feet together and now I am struggling to go up with one leg kicking up… so I am steps backwards somehow. I do not know what is the reason for this but will work on it as long as I need to…
November 21 2008
It has been a week since I got to Goa. My train journey was longggg… I am glad I made it but I would not do it again, I think… at least, not the Bangalore-Hubli- Vasco Da Gama route… that was too long and a hassle to shlap my stuff around from bus to train to another train to a bus again and to another bus and to taxi…. I guess it is a bit difficult to do a train journey when you are alone and have bit mush stuff with you. Do not misunderstand, this time I am traveling much lighter but I have got my computer… and that is a big responsibility and also a bit of weight to carry on my back… Well, I made it all right. The ride from Mysore to Bangalore was good since I was with Elena who did not stop talking for the rest of the journey and of course, I did not stop talking either ☺ Yes that was pretty easy and fun ride in a tin can. And when we got to Bangalore for 83 rupees each, Elena put me on this van for 6 rupees, which got me close to the train station. Well, I had to shlap my stuff for a while on the road then up and down the stairs… hardly made it to train on time… that was not much fun. I hardly found where the train was. There was a info boot and when I asked the lady she snapped me for being far from her (could not hear me) and then she wrote on my paper ticket some numbers which I thought were the platform numbers… As I tried to find that platform the newsstand guy said “to Hubli, you got go to platform 8, this number is train number” and luckily I believed him and found the train and on the way, I also realized that train number was some other number written on the ticket and those numbers she wrote were seat numbers which did not matter because you just sit on a seat you find… so, thanks to the newsstand guy, I found my way. The train arrived and everyone rushed to the train as people tried to get out of it. I made my way while being pushed around by Indian women… did not see any Westerners really. While I was moving along the train to find a seat and pulling my duffle back, the man behind me began yelling at me, he was frustrated about my bag. I said what can I do I move as the people in front of me move, he yelled more and I yelled back that I cannot fly the bag over my head…. Then, magically, I saw a seat, there was an older lady and a younger man, and the younger man told me that I can sit. So, as I tried to settle down, the man who was yelling at me come over to the same seat area. I mumbled in Turkish if he could not find any other seat but apparently the younger man who told me I can sit with them was his son. And in a minute both of us mellowed down as if it was not us who were yelling at each other a minute ago. He translated his wife’s question to me and on…. Then a young couple also joined us… The view from the train while there was day light was very green…. Half way through, the son, the wife and the man got of and I felt sorry that they left (figure that out, it only happens in India… ). The young couple was shy but later on, the young man talked to me a little bit, he told me that the young woman is his brother’s wife, they are from Bangalore going somewhere which is before Hubli… Again I felt bad because it was getting dark and the train was getting deserted with less and less women and I did not want to loose my companions. So, they also got off at some point. I was getting sleepy, there were only men around me. One man sat across from me, he was okay, just glued to his cell phone. For almost two hours, he kept dialing numbers and talked on his cell phone about the same issue, I just got that he was concerned about some fax number. It looked a bit overwhelming. It was either a very important matter or he just could not sit without doing nothing.
When we arrived to Hubli it was 10PM. I got off the train, there were only passengers around… but I was determined to find a person who works there and I did. I asked about the sleeper train to Goa. He checked my ticket and told me to stay with him and then he put me to my vagon. That was very very nice of him, otherwise; I was a bit clueless… The sleeper train was okey. Ther were couple of Westerners this time. They gave us a sheet, a blanket and a pillow. I just got the sheet to put under me.
When we arrived to Vasco Da Gama, it was very early morning. I wanted to get the bus to Panaji. There were taxi drivers trying to trick me to take a taxi, telling me bus stand is far away… But I just got grumpy with them and walked straight ahead… After all this way, I was not going to give up here, I was determined to take the bus… and the busses were not so far. It was a nice ride, it was bright morning, and I could feel the difference of Goa air, and Goans already. The bus journey from Vasco Da Gama to Panaji was 16-17 rupees. The ride was surprisingly not long at all. Then I decided that I can make it to Mapsa with the bus again, I could not give up there… So, I got another bus to Mapsa which was 8 rupees but I could not get my change for 10 rupees but would not complain… We were in Mapsa at no time. When I arrived to Mapsa it was time for a taxi. One man offered me to take me with motorbike, I was almost gonna run after him since I was so tired and what was he thinking? Me, my heavy backpack and duffle back behind him on a motor bike? Then I saw a taxi driver I said to Arpora and asked how much, he said 400 rupees I said I am no tourist, I will pay 150 rupees. Of course he refused but another one jumped front and took me to Arpora for 150 rupees!
I arrived to Queenie’s place. The house Alex got for us for this season is a very nice 3 bedroom house right next to Queenie’s house. The living room is big and there is a very nice kitchen. Bedrooms are upstairs, two of them open to a huge balcony… not mine. However, we are a bit far from the shala. It is about 15 minute ride. In the beginning I freaked a bit because of the drive but now I seemed to be getting used to driving. There are also nice places in Candolim, and I guess next time, I will stay over there by the beach. Candolim is very nice, peaceful. The beach is clean and quiet. The new shala is very nice. We are at the roof top, we began when it is dark and while were still doing the standing postures, the daylight takes over. Both Rolf and Marci are in very good mood. I am blessed!
November 14 2008
This morning was the last class in the shala this year… Yesterday was full moon so there was no practice but we carried on with the acroyoga-thai/Mysore massage course (I don’t know what to call it anymore ☺ ). It was a good class, we did the partner yoga sequence we learned but Donna and I were not much into flying so we did not do any of that and then it was the massage part. Fort the massage, we used the feet mainly. Yesterday, it was my turn to give a massage and since we did not have any practice in the morning, I had energy so it was nice to be giving massage. It was also Wayne’s birthday, and at the end, we had ragi ball feast, which are apparently Wayne’s favorite food! Ragi balls are made from finger millet (ragi is finger millet), they are brown dumplings and not so small in size and they are mushy in texture, which I really liked. As we are told, some people feel like they will choke while eating them because of this mushy texture but for me, it was baby/comfort food. They are served with garlicky tomato sauce and coconut chutney; otherwise, by themselves, they are very plain. Nutritional wise, they are high in protein and low in fat. Wayne told us that Guruji used to tell them ragi balls make you strong. Ohh also they are special to state of Karnataka… Well, I discovered them at the last minute, but the next time I am here, I will be eating a lot of them ☺!
This morning, I woke up before 3AM. The anxiety of traveling woke me up. TH practice was nice. Sharat was a bit more
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
The black cat is dead!
This morning was not easy to wake up. I was still tired and my body was achy… Still crawled out of bed and then I did some hip openers because I am having knee pain… It was my right knee when I arrived and as I expected the right knee pain went away after few weeks practicing in the shala but then my left knee began aching… It is different kind of pain than the right knee had. For the right, the pain was at the back of the knee, with the left, pain is more inside of the knee… so I am just watching it, taking care of it… So if I do just basic hip openers by the wall, it helps a bit.
But lets come back to the body after Acroyoga. I began thinking that I am not cut for acroyoga. Maybe this is not right… it was just my first time yesterday… well, yesterday, I could feel my legs getting achy… this morning, my upper arms, my right wrist, my buttocks, my legs were all achy and I Was tired so the practice was not easy… I did not have that vibrancy I had yesterday morning… I guess taking this course was not the best decision in my last week at the shala. Well, I was not expecting such dynamic class, since it said Mysore massage and acroyoga etc… but it is what it is… Going back to practice, after I did my last backbend on the floor, Sharat came and smiled and did a gestures with his hands which I interpreted as he was pleased with my Kapotanasana… then he waited me to finish my drop backs with which I got a bit nervous because he was in front of me waiting… then the holding the ankles. He is very smooth with that, and today I could balance on my own after he got me there…
So, to go back to acroyoga or not? Well, I went back today… This time, I paired up with Donna… she was having difficulty working with Chris as I was having difficulty working with Scott… well, just being able to hold up men is much more difficult because of strength and weight differences. I can say it was better with Donna but still, I feel like I am the weakest link. I cannot hold her up much long. But I went through another day.
By the way, this afternoon, I stopped by the shala to tell Sharat that this Friday will be my last day. He said "ohh okey" and I thanked him and told him that I want to come back when he is teaching again (the rumors of him taking a break etc.). I asked whether to check on his web site and he said yes and he asked whether I know his website or not and then he went inside to give me his card. His card is very nice, full of the wild life photos he has taken...
What else there is? Ohhh you mean the title? That is the black cat. You remember the black cat which was waking up in the middle of the night and pissing on my window? He is dead because someone poisoned him. My sister called few minutes ago in tears. She said that she found him in her garden dead with foams in his mouth which means someone poisoned him. My sister had been feeding her along with other street cats and as you all know, he liked to hang out in her garden so he came back to the garden to die because it was like his home. I wish that he is peaceful wherever he is now...
But lets come back to the body after Acroyoga. I began thinking that I am not cut for acroyoga. Maybe this is not right… it was just my first time yesterday… well, yesterday, I could feel my legs getting achy… this morning, my upper arms, my right wrist, my buttocks, my legs were all achy and I Was tired so the practice was not easy… I did not have that vibrancy I had yesterday morning… I guess taking this course was not the best decision in my last week at the shala. Well, I was not expecting such dynamic class, since it said Mysore massage and acroyoga etc… but it is what it is… Going back to practice, after I did my last backbend on the floor, Sharat came and smiled and did a gestures with his hands which I interpreted as he was pleased with my Kapotanasana… then he waited me to finish my drop backs with which I got a bit nervous because he was in front of me waiting… then the holding the ankles. He is very smooth with that, and today I could balance on my own after he got me there…
So, to go back to acroyoga or not? Well, I went back today… This time, I paired up with Donna… she was having difficulty working with Chris as I was having difficulty working with Scott… well, just being able to hold up men is much more difficult because of strength and weight differences. I can say it was better with Donna but still, I feel like I am the weakest link. I cannot hold her up much long. But I went through another day.
By the way, this afternoon, I stopped by the shala to tell Sharat that this Friday will be my last day. He said "ohh okey" and I thanked him and told him that I want to come back when he is teaching again (the rumors of him taking a break etc.). I asked whether to check on his web site and he said yes and he asked whether I know his website or not and then he went inside to give me his card. His card is very nice, full of the wild life photos he has taken...
What else there is? Ohhh you mean the title? That is the black cat. You remember the black cat which was waking up in the middle of the night and pissing on my window? He is dead because someone poisoned him. My sister called few minutes ago in tears. She said that she found him in her garden dead with foams in his mouth which means someone poisoned him. My sister had been feeding her along with other street cats and as you all know, he liked to hang out in her garden so he came back to the garden to die because it was like his home. I wish that he is peaceful wherever he is now...
Monday, November 10, 2008
Acroyoga
Today, I started Mysore massage-Acroyoga Level I course, which is taught by Wane from Miami. It is Monday through Friday that means I will miss Friday class because I am leaving in the morning for Goa (both ☺ and ☹ )… Therefore, I am having a glimpse of something new: acroyoga-partner yoga… I am partners with Scott, I think we are having quite fun together. Today, after doing backpack, fire man and cave man, which were pretty cool way of stretching each other and also adjusting in down dog while preparing to cave man, we learned flying. I can fly well since Scott is able to get me up in the air but the challenge was me getting Scott up in the air. First, it felt like impossible but then I figured out that it was all about balancing properly. T Then I could get him up in the air and then also could drop him (ooppss!). Well, luckily he was not hurt. We tried again and again… It helps built strength when you are helping the other fly and then if you are the one up, it is about using your muscles and bandhas properly to balance up there and getting into different postures and also lots of fun! At the end of all this, we gave each other savasana massage; that was pretty nice and needed!
This morning, practice was good as well. Now I am doing up till Kapotasana and then backbends feel great!
This morning, practice was good as well. Now I am doing up till Kapotasana and then backbends feel great!
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Moving along nicely…
Yesterday the shala was closed, so again we practiced at the studio above where Colette stays… She and her housemates were nice to invite us again… The space where you practice makes such a big difference and also practicing with others…
After practice, I and Tatyana went to Tina’s for breakfast… Afterwards, I walked to the lake and around the lake and back with Terry… On the way, we stopped by Austrian café and had lunch… it was nice to have more of a Western food… Well, in Goa, the food will be great :)
This morning, practice was fine. I did up till Ustrasana since that was my homework for Wednesday. Then did my backbends and got up for drop backs. At that moment, I heard Sharat asking “what did you do?” so I looked over to see if he was talking to me and yes he was. I said Ustrasana , and then he said do Laghu Vajrasana , as I did I heard him say “himm good” and so he said Monday Kapotasana ”. I am happy about this! I really wanted to get to Kapotasana before I leave Mysore; I did not expect this to happen but life is full of surprises!
Today, I sent a package to home through Rashinkars. I do not want to travel heavy… I did some shopping here… bags from Lokesh, some pillow cases, then couple of books… (yes I read the “Health, Healing, and Beyond Yoga and the Living Tradition of Krishnamacharya” book so it is also sailing…) and then for my mom, I got some Ayurvedic soaps she likes… It was not much stuff ; I guess, more weight you send, less you pay but still it was not bad… Rashinkars is a good place to send things, but they do not do only books. If you are sending lots of books, it is better to send them separately from the post office; the book rate is very cheap!
After practice, I and Tatyana went to Tina’s for breakfast… Afterwards, I walked to the lake and around the lake and back with Terry… On the way, we stopped by Austrian café and had lunch… it was nice to have more of a Western food… Well, in Goa, the food will be great :)
This morning, practice was fine. I did up till Ustrasana since that was my homework for Wednesday. Then did my backbends and got up for drop backs. At that moment, I heard Sharat asking “what did you do?” so I looked over to see if he was talking to me and yes he was. I said Ustrasana , and then he said do Laghu Vajrasana , as I did I heard him say “himm good” and so he said Monday Kapotasana ”. I am happy about this! I really wanted to get to Kapotasana before I leave Mysore; I did not expect this to happen but life is full of surprises!
Today, I sent a package to home through Rashinkars. I do not want to travel heavy… I did some shopping here… bags from Lokesh, some pillow cases, then couple of books… (yes I read the “Health, Healing, and Beyond Yoga and the Living Tradition of Krishnamacharya” book so it is also sailing…) and then for my mom, I got some Ayurvedic soaps she likes… It was not much stuff ; I guess, more weight you send, less you pay but still it was not bad… Rashinkars is a good place to send things, but they do not do only books. If you are sending lots of books, it is better to send them separately from the post office; the book rate is very cheap!
Monday, November 03, 2008
Teachers
Yesterday, at the conference, Sharat talked about the Guru. Finding our guru and surrendering to our guru, to our teacher… He said no one could tell you that they are your Guru, you have to feel it and when you find your Guru you will know it, you will feel it inside. He said that when we talk to our Guru, we feel the knowledge they have about yoga and then we decide that they are our Guru. While I was listening to him, I thought he was describing the way I feel about Rolf. Before I met Rolf, as I was preparing for my trip to Goa last year, I told my mom that I feel something very beautiful will happen in Goa… and yes it happened, there I found my teacher. As Sharat described yesterday, I felt it inside, in my heart that Rolf was my teacher, my Guru. Of course, I feel devotion and respect to Guruji and every time, every morning I remember how grateful I feel that Guruji has brought us this practice. I feel grateful that he shared his knowledge with Westerners who became teachers to us. When it comes to Sharat, he is very perceptive, he is very humble and he is fair and so I regard him as my teacher as well. However, to be honest, that feeling he was talking about, I feel it for Rolf. Rolf touched my heart with the love he has for every single person, with his caring, loving approach to every student. I guess it is a moment that we get it from someone, suddenly we find ourselves in bliss in the presence of this one person and they become our Guru…
On the other hand, I also feel great devotion for Osho. I regard him as the master. I have been to Pune twice and there were moments that I could not hold my tears during the evening meetings when I see him in the big screen, listening to one of his discourses. Sometimes, he would speak directly to me, to my sadness, to my confusion. The last night before I left Pune, he was talking about being close to the master does not mean being physically close. So many are physically close but they do not get it and some get very close but they get scared and step back… From Osho, I had the confirmation of having the right to be in this world… It might sound strange to some people; you might ask “why did you need such a confirmation?” Well, I did need it for some reason… I felt loved, unconditionally loved by Osho even tough he is not in his body, never born, never died… I felt that I am okay as the way I am… and he taught me to express myself. I love Osho meditations, I love reading and listening to his discourses. Some of the Osho therapy groups can take one really deep inside and show the bliss in this world…
Putting all these together… I can say that Rolf is my teacher, my Guru who is alive, who is an example of great dedication to practice and not only that but he is also the person who has that unconditional love for everyone which I felt from Osho the first time… Sometimes, I get confused, I feel thorn… I love my practice, I enjoy it and cherish it very much. But I also love to explore more with different methods Osho used… I know I do not need to be thorn… I can bring more and less as I need. I guess the feeling of being thorn comes because I listen too much of other people when I should know I can do as I feel, I do not need to give u pone for the other, I know what is good for me and I just need to tune in…
Enough of my feelings regarding teachers, Gurus, Masters…
Today’s practice was fine. I guess I could be more vibrant but I was not. However, at the end of my practice, after I did my backbends and backdrops, Sharat came to help with grabbing the ankles and he asked what did you do (meaning what I did last) I said “ Bhekasana .” he said “Only that?” now do Dhanurasana and Parshva Dhanurasana for these two days” so I went down to the floor and did those two. Then I did back bends again and one more backdrop which became super easy after so many… Sharat came again and he said Wednesday you do Ustrasana at home. (Wednesday shala is closed for some reason… so we are all practicing at home… ) I said “Homework” Then he helped me with grabbing the ankles and as I came up he was chuckling again… I do not know why but I guess it cannot be bad.
On the other hand, I also feel great devotion for Osho. I regard him as the master. I have been to Pune twice and there were moments that I could not hold my tears during the evening meetings when I see him in the big screen, listening to one of his discourses. Sometimes, he would speak directly to me, to my sadness, to my confusion. The last night before I left Pune, he was talking about being close to the master does not mean being physically close. So many are physically close but they do not get it and some get very close but they get scared and step back… From Osho, I had the confirmation of having the right to be in this world… It might sound strange to some people; you might ask “why did you need such a confirmation?” Well, I did need it for some reason… I felt loved, unconditionally loved by Osho even tough he is not in his body, never born, never died… I felt that I am okay as the way I am… and he taught me to express myself. I love Osho meditations, I love reading and listening to his discourses. Some of the Osho therapy groups can take one really deep inside and show the bliss in this world…
Putting all these together… I can say that Rolf is my teacher, my Guru who is alive, who is an example of great dedication to practice and not only that but he is also the person who has that unconditional love for everyone which I felt from Osho the first time… Sometimes, I get confused, I feel thorn… I love my practice, I enjoy it and cherish it very much. But I also love to explore more with different methods Osho used… I know I do not need to be thorn… I can bring more and less as I need. I guess the feeling of being thorn comes because I listen too much of other people when I should know I can do as I feel, I do not need to give u pone for the other, I know what is good for me and I just need to tune in…
Enough of my feelings regarding teachers, Gurus, Masters…
Today’s practice was fine. I guess I could be more vibrant but I was not. However, at the end of my practice, after I did my backbends and backdrops, Sharat came to help with grabbing the ankles and he asked what did you do (meaning what I did last) I said “ Bhekasana .” he said “Only that?” now do Dhanurasana and Parshva Dhanurasana for these two days” so I went down to the floor and did those two. Then I did back bends again and one more backdrop which became super easy after so many… Sharat came again and he said Wednesday you do Ustrasana at home. (Wednesday shala is closed for some reason… so we are all practicing at home… ) I said “Homework” Then he helped me with grabbing the ankles and as I came up he was chuckling again… I do not know why but I guess it cannot be bad.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Cooking class, walking around...
Friday, we did a cooking class with Tina. She taught how to make Chole and Aloo Gobi. Tina is a great teacher! In the beginning, she goes through the spice box, tells us the use and benefits of the each spice in the box and then also which oils to cook with etc… She cooks northern Indian food since she is from Bengal. I did one of her cooking classes during my first time here in Mysore; then she taught how to make palak paneer and vegetable kurma and I made the palak paneer at home afterwards with making the paneer and all as she taught… Well, this time also, she told us the benefits of fenugreek seeds and leafs with digestive properties, also the ginger with its digestive and decongestant properties, and of course turmeric and its internal and external healing properties… Then she continued with cooking the two dishes. At the end, she also showed us how to make roti dough and how to bake it over the skillet. Of course, after all this, we sat down for a feast!!!
Friday night, there was also a Halloween party at some yoga students’ house. We dropped by for a bit. They had a really nice house; the party was at their terrace…
Saturday was just very random. I had to run to Anu’s in the morning to do internetting. Then I went back home and stepped out again to buy minutes for my cell phone and I came across to Jonathan on the way. He was going by Green Leaf to take care some things, so I joined him. After he took care of his business, we had coffee at Coffee Day and then he wanted to go to Fab India. We went to Fab India, just looked around, did not buy anything and from there, we walked to the Palace… Actually, we were trying to find this restaurant we heard from someone, Om Shanti, a thali restaurant. We thought we could walk there but as we arrived to the Palace and after asking few people, we decided it was worth taking a rickshaw. We arrived to the restaurant but it was crazy crowded because tour buses kept bringing Indian tourists to the place. On top of every table, another family was waiting so the eating one would finish and they could sit. After 10 minutes, I said this is insane I am not going to stand over anyone who is eating and not let them enjoy it and I am not going to eat when some other people standing over us waiting for us to finish eating… Luckily, the man at the cashier was nice enough to reimburse us for the thali tickets I bought. After this, we walked around, not really knowing where we were and then took another rickshaw to go to the new Dasprakash hotel. There, we had a nice thali and then we walked back to Gokulam!
This morning’s led class was fine. For some reason, waking up for 4:30 AM led class on Friday mornings is really difficult while I wake up by myself on Sunday mornings at the same time for the led class. I wander if it is because after Friday morning, my body expects to wake up at that time again on Sunday and then it forgets during the whole week until Friday or just the rest day on Saturday makes it easy to wake up… One thing tough, my left knee is bothering me. I am not sure what is going on with it… My right knee, which was bothering me when I arrived here is doing pretty well, and now the left one is poking me… I will just watch and see and maybe do some hip openers in the mornings before the practice..
Today, after breakfast we went to the Organic market. I got some green salad that I cannot wait to eat for lunch! It has been a month since I had salad!!!
Friday night, there was also a Halloween party at some yoga students’ house. We dropped by for a bit. They had a really nice house; the party was at their terrace…
Saturday was just very random. I had to run to Anu’s in the morning to do internetting. Then I went back home and stepped out again to buy minutes for my cell phone and I came across to Jonathan on the way. He was going by Green Leaf to take care some things, so I joined him. After he took care of his business, we had coffee at Coffee Day and then he wanted to go to Fab India. We went to Fab India, just looked around, did not buy anything and from there, we walked to the Palace… Actually, we were trying to find this restaurant we heard from someone, Om Shanti, a thali restaurant. We thought we could walk there but as we arrived to the Palace and after asking few people, we decided it was worth taking a rickshaw. We arrived to the restaurant but it was crazy crowded because tour buses kept bringing Indian tourists to the place. On top of every table, another family was waiting so the eating one would finish and they could sit. After 10 minutes, I said this is insane I am not going to stand over anyone who is eating and not let them enjoy it and I am not going to eat when some other people standing over us waiting for us to finish eating… Luckily, the man at the cashier was nice enough to reimburse us for the thali tickets I bought. After this, we walked around, not really knowing where we were and then took another rickshaw to go to the new Dasprakash hotel. There, we had a nice thali and then we walked back to Gokulam!
This morning’s led class was fine. For some reason, waking up for 4:30 AM led class on Friday mornings is really difficult while I wake up by myself on Sunday mornings at the same time for the led class. I wander if it is because after Friday morning, my body expects to wake up at that time again on Sunday and then it forgets during the whole week until Friday or just the rest day on Saturday makes it easy to wake up… One thing tough, my left knee is bothering me. I am not sure what is going on with it… My right knee, which was bothering me when I arrived here is doing pretty well, and now the left one is poking me… I will just watch and see and maybe do some hip openers in the mornings before the practice..
Today, after breakfast we went to the Organic market. I got some green salad that I cannot wait to eat for lunch! It has been a month since I had salad!!!
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Diwali week
Today is the last day of Diwali. It has been lots of fire crackers since Monday; as the sun begins setting, the streets become like a war zone, smoke and the noise of blasting fire crackers… Monday was off due to Diwali and yesterday was new moon holiday. But on Monday, one of our friends, Colette, who lives in Alexandra Medina’s house invited us for practice in the studio which is upstairs of their house. Quite a number of people showed up, it was like a regular practice, all the sweat and everything… I did my whole practice for the first time since I got to Mysore, it felt good…
Today, practice was good. I was just in front of the stage. I am getting stronger... I can feel it. Also, Mauricio, who was away for some weeks, came back and said “you look stronger” ; therefore, something is happening… This morning, as I was doing Krounchasana , Sharath was helping the person next to me and then he looked over to me and said “chin up, point the toes, and look at your toes!”
Tonight Dagmar is leaving for Mangalore. I will miss her a lot! But me talking her head off she decided to spend her last week in Goa, practicing with Rolf! She will stay with me; since the house will be empty until others show up, there will be a room for her!
Today, practice was good. I was just in front of the stage. I am getting stronger... I can feel it. Also, Mauricio, who was away for some weeks, came back and said “you look stronger” ; therefore, something is happening… This morning, as I was doing
Tonight Dagmar is leaving for Mangalore. I will miss her a lot! But me talking her head off she decided to spend her last week in Goa, practicing with Rolf! She will stay with me; since the house will be empty until others show up, there will be a room for her!
Friday, October 24, 2008
Out of Lassi
Yesterday afternoon, while we were in our last Sanskrit Level I class, rain began pouring. Then it sounded like slowing down, but as we got out of the class, it was going on really hard. After staring in the rain for few minutes, we decided to jump in. Even though I live on the same street with the shala, I was pretty much soaked when I got home. The street was like a river…
This morning, led class was fine, but I feel heavy when practice is so early. I need to get used to that. After practice, went home did some laundry, changed my bed sheets and then put an Osho discourse, laid down to listen him talking about ‘trust’ and dozed a bit during. Then got up to go to Santosha for breakfast. After breakfast, Dagmar and I went to Lakshmipuram to get her scooter. We also sopped by at Three Sisters to have their famous lassis but they were out of lassi, too many people came before us ☹ so have to try again!
Tomorrow we will go to Metropal for lunch buffet! Plans are all around food here! We are very fortunate to be here and enjoy it all…
This monday the shala is closed due to Diwali festival and then Tuesday is moon day... But it seems like few of us are getting together to do home practice, if not I have enough space in my room... Ahh, 3 weeks left for me to leave Mysore for Goa, I kind of feel sad... and wish for one more week here, then it will be exactly 2 months in Mysore... but I signed up for the workshop on the 16th of November with Rolf and Marci at Brahmani and also Marci is expecting me to begin practice with them on the 17th of November... so have to get going when it is time...
This morning, led class was fine, but I feel heavy when practice is so early. I need to get used to that. After practice, went home did some laundry, changed my bed sheets and then put an Osho discourse, laid down to listen him talking about ‘trust’ and dozed a bit during. Then got up to go to Santosha for breakfast. After breakfast, Dagmar and I went to Lakshmipuram to get her scooter. We also sopped by at Three Sisters to have their famous lassis but they were out of lassi, too many people came before us ☹ so have to try again!
Tomorrow we will go to Metropal for lunch buffet! Plans are all around food here! We are very fortunate to be here and enjoy it all…
This monday the shala is closed due to Diwali festival and then Tuesday is moon day... But it seems like few of us are getting together to do home practice, if not I have enough space in my room... Ahh, 3 weeks left for me to leave Mysore for Goa, I kind of feel sad... and wish for one more week here, then it will be exactly 2 months in Mysore... but I signed up for the workshop on the 16th of November with Rolf and Marci at Brahmani and also Marci is expecting me to begin practice with them on the 17th of November... so have to get going when it is time...
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Fruits of letting go...
Days are going by really fast. Yesterday, Dagmar and I went to Lakshmipuram after watching the French News, which filmed us during led primary class few weeks back. It was quite difficult to find this film in the internet but we managed!!! Then, I had a quick lunch at Anu’s and then we went to Lakshmipuram. First to Nilgri’s to buy flax seeds and then to West Side. Flax seeds are for me, the nutritional analysis results show that I need Omega 3 more (also Omega 6) and flax seeds are a good source of it. I just grounded them up in Gita’s blender and I will put it over my food as I remember to do… At West side, Dagmar got a really nice top; I did buy nothing. Finding what to buy part was pretty easy and fun but paying part took long because the guy who was at the cashier could not figure out something. He managed to charge the card, so what was the problem, we could not understand. After 3 men looking on the screen and one of them typing stuff over and over, this little girl came down from upstairs and she hit few buttons and it was all sorted out, here goes women power! Then, we tried to find our way back home, getting a bit lost but managed it at the end. When we got back, my head was buzzing from driving on the scooter in the afternoon traffic… After stopping at home, I went to pick up the pants and the dress my tailor made for me both of which do not fit me, but I did not fuss about it. So, I gave the dress to Claudio because it fits her much better and the pants, I do not want to think about them… Sudha will be making me two pants, and I know they will fit nicely and if they don’t, she does not want me to buy them…
After going home for a shower, I went to Kumar for the afternoon meditation. This week the meditation starts at 6:30P.M. because we are doing the Osho Gourishankar Meditation and it is better to do it after the sun set. Then I went home, watched one episode of Lost, read some from my Health and Healing book, which is about Krishnamacharya.
This morning I woke up with nausea… I just did some of my nauli exercises and then laid down for a while… Then, went off to practice, wishing to make it through all right and focusing, focusing and focusing no more thoughts…. I did focus and made it through the practice. At the end, Sharat came to help with ankle grabbing. He asked me “what did you do last?”, I said “Krounchasana”, he said “ohh… Then tomorrow Salabasana” (Salabasana A, Salabasana B) he stopped and then added “ Bhekasana ). Tomorrow, both Salabasana and Bhekasana”. Yeah that got me smiling a big smile! Just as I stopped whining about not getting more asanas and if he was aware of my presence and all that yes then things start moving forward… Therefore, yes, need to stop whining, need to focus more, need to work on jump backs and troughs… I am actually working on jump backs harder; I am now picking up as usually but different from before I am not putting hands forward after picking up but not moving my hands from where they are and taking legs back in a I guess funny way and working towards something more like proper jump backs…
Well this is all for now. And it began raining again, a big one for mid day… I am at Anu’s now and my laundry back at home is having a nice rain bath ☺
After going home for a shower, I went to Kumar for the afternoon meditation. This week the meditation starts at 6:30P.M. because we are doing the Osho Gourishankar Meditation and it is better to do it after the sun set. Then I went home, watched one episode of Lost, read some from my Health and Healing book, which is about Krishnamacharya.
This morning I woke up with nausea… I just did some of my nauli exercises and then laid down for a while… Then, went off to practice, wishing to make it through all right and focusing, focusing and focusing no more thoughts…. I did focus and made it through the practice. At the end, Sharat came to help with ankle grabbing. He asked me “what did you do last?”, I said “Krounchasana”, he said “ohh… Then tomorrow Salabasana” (Salabasana A, Salabasana B) he stopped and then added “ Bhekasana ). Tomorrow, both Salabasana and Bhekasana”. Yeah that got me smiling a big smile! Just as I stopped whining about not getting more asanas and if he was aware of my presence and all that yes then things start moving forward… Therefore, yes, need to stop whining, need to focus more, need to work on jump backs and troughs… I am actually working on jump backs harder; I am now picking up as usually but different from before I am not putting hands forward after picking up but not moving my hands from where they are and taking legs back in a I guess funny way and working towards something more like proper jump backs…
Well this is all for now. And it began raining again, a big one for mid day… I am at Anu’s now and my laundry back at home is having a nice rain bath ☺
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Weekend
This Saturday was a shopping day again. After breakfast at Tina’s, Claudia and I went to city for shopping for cotton sari and bed spreads and I was also hoping to pick up the ear studs I ordered at Suddharsans. First we looked for cotton saris but for some reason all the shops say the nice Indian prints do not exist in cotton saris… So after seeing few shops, we ended up at Rashinkars again, I told them that the “cotton” sari I got from them was not pure cotton and after washing it was still hard and asked if they have saris in pure cotton… After looking at some stuff they got, which were beautiful but not what I was looking for, the nice Indian motifs… Still, I really liked few of the saris, but then when they took us upstairs to show ready made tops and so forth, they showed all these nice materials to make shalwer kamez, and they were kind of fabrics that I was trying to find!!! After maybe 5 visits to Rashinkars, at the end they showed me what I was looking for! So, for your info, Rashinkar has some nice fabrics, that comes in a set of three, one to make a top, the other to make pants and then the shawl; they all match but in different colors and designs…. Still we decided to have a look at Fab India because so far whatever my tailor makes for me do not fit me!!! He is very nice but I feel like I am wasting fabric and money on things I cannot wear… Before going to Fab India, we went to Devaraj road and Claudia looked for jeans for her stay in Europe after India, since they are cheaper here. Also, we found a shop, which had the comforters Claudia was looking for… I also sopped by at the Suddharsans to see if they made my ear studs and yes they did!!! So, I got them and am wearing them now! After all this, we took a rickshaw to Fab India, which is in Lakshmipuram. They really have some fabulous stuff, very nice kurtas, tops, skirts, shawls form very good quality cottons with nice colors and designs. After all, I ended up buying one kurta and one top form Fab India… I also bumped into Martha and her husband again. Martha was in Level I of Tias’s Teacher Training in Santa Fe. I first saw them in front of Loyal World last week and yesterday again… Her husband was excited about talking with us about the practice. He asked me if I progress in my practice by practicing in the shala and when I said yes he was very surprised! Well, I explained him that practicing solo versus practicing with all these people makes a huge difference; it triples my energy level and lifts me up. HE asked whether I achieved anything new, and I said “actually yes, but not what I had in my mind…” but I refused to tell him what it was… I just did not feel like bragging about such stuff… Then he asked if I were teaching yoga in Istanbul, and what kind whether Vinyasa flow or ashtanga… I told him I teach ashtanga and I do not enjoy Vinyasa flow much. He said “strict ashtanga, primary series”, and then he added “that might change in few years” Here came a trigger to me ☺… My answer was, “and it might not, Rolf has been doing it for 30 years and he seems to love it still… and I love it very much” After, Claudia and I went out, of course I was mumbling stuff like “ why people need to comment on such stuff when they now nothing about me…” and Claudia told me “ you know, in such cases I just nod, I am not even listening sometimes, it come from one ear and goes out from the other… not important, you get really frustrated over other people’s comments!” She was so right and I have to learn how to led things come form one ear and go from the other before Claudia and I part ways!
Practice this morning was tough. I felt very tired at 4:30 AM in the morning. Then, close to the end of the practice, after Upavishta Konasana , I forgot Supta Konasana , so there I was preparing for Supta Padangusthasana , and of course I got caught and Sharath yelled at me “which one???”… I thought “here goes my hope for getting Shalabasana tomorrow! Ohh well, it is all okey but I wonder why I keep forgetting asanas here. Maybe it is just because it was still early for me to practice at 4:30 this morning or I have to focus better.
This Tuesday, my first month will finish here, time is flying by…
Practice this morning was tough. I felt very tired at 4:30 AM in the morning. Then, close to the end of the practice, after
This Tuesday, my first month will finish here, time is flying by…
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Week of Anatomy class and practice
It is already end of the week. It has been a cloudy, rainy week which is good I think, not so hot. Tomorrow is led class; I am in the 4:45A.M. batch now according to the schedule Sharath put on the board! Ashtanga while sleeping… You know right 4:45 AM shala time means 4:30 real time and to get in, we begin cuing up at 4:15 shala time!
Agnieszka’s left on Monday night ☹. Tuesday was moon day, it was anatomy class and then I went S.N. Jois for a Vedic astrology reading. What I can tell is that he was spooky rite about some things and very off with other things and then he had some predictions and I will see what happens regarding them in the future… Wednesday practice was okay and this time, Sharath let his hands go after he helped me grab my calves in backbends… yes I could stay there without him holding!! I did not think I could do that so soon! After practice, Sharath was taking people to puja in this new temple… but I did not go, I chose breakfast over puja! Is that bad, I don’t know… Then it was anatomy class with Ken again, we studied the pelvic floor… And if I got anything from yesterday's class, it is that the two things that make yoga difficult for us are sitting in chairs and carrying weight on our shoulders; we, humans are actually, anatomically suppose to sit on the floor and carry weight on our heads like Indian women... then late lunch at Tina’s new café; it was very good food and very cheap too! Then Sanskrit class in the afternoon. I told Lakshmish that I will not stay for chanting class anymore, and he just shook his head… I enjoy Sanskrit level I now, it is like puzzle, but I really get bored chanting straight ahead without talking about the meaning of what we chant…
Today practice was good. Then, Santosha for breakfast and then last day of Anatomy class. It was very interesting class today. Ken talked about Mula bandha and Uddiyana bandha anatomically and also about soas muscle. Afterwards, we had lunch at Cenakis (I donnu how to spell it out really), it was good food. Now time to chill a bit until tomorrow morning.
Agnieszka’s left on Monday night ☹. Tuesday was moon day, it was anatomy class and then I went S.N. Jois for a Vedic astrology reading. What I can tell is that he was spooky rite about some things and very off with other things and then he had some predictions and I will see what happens regarding them in the future… Wednesday practice was okay and this time, Sharath let his hands go after he helped me grab my calves in backbends… yes I could stay there without him holding!! I did not think I could do that so soon! After practice, Sharath was taking people to puja in this new temple… but I did not go, I chose breakfast over puja! Is that bad, I don’t know… Then it was anatomy class with Ken again, we studied the pelvic floor… And if I got anything from yesterday's class, it is that the two things that make yoga difficult for us are sitting in chairs and carrying weight on our shoulders; we, humans are actually, anatomically suppose to sit on the floor and carry weight on our heads like Indian women... then late lunch at Tina’s new café; it was very good food and very cheap too! Then Sanskrit class in the afternoon. I told Lakshmish that I will not stay for chanting class anymore, and he just shook his head… I enjoy Sanskrit level I now, it is like puzzle, but I really get bored chanting straight ahead without talking about the meaning of what we chant…
Today practice was good. Then, Santosha for breakfast and then last day of Anatomy class. It was very interesting class today. Ken talked about Mula bandha and Uddiyana bandha anatomically and also about soas muscle. Afterwards, we had lunch at Cenakis (I donnu how to spell it out really), it was good food. Now time to chill a bit until tomorrow morning.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Weekend to today
Saturday was a full day shopping! First we had breakfast at OM café and of course everybody else decided to have breakfast there as well, so I was sitting between Melanie and Agnieszka’s chair for quite a while but then we managed to grab a chair, which got emptied… Now they have a mini market on Saturday’s at OM café, Dominic, the French lady had beautiful shawls and sandalwood necklaces/bracelets, I could not buy anything since I had no $ with me but next Saturday I will get something from her! Then right after breakfast we, Agni, Claudia, Jonathan and Jessica went to the city. Our first stop was Sapna bookstore from where I got a tiny Osho book just to keep my heart beating, then we walked to Ashoka bookstore, form there we went to the Bata store at the corner. I was hoping to find those cute plastic shoes and did, Claudia and me got pink plastic shoes! Afterwards we went to Rashinkars. I got a cotton sari with beautiful pattern and others also got saris, lungue (how do you spell that?) and books. Then we had to run for food. I do not remember the name of the place but it looked like a sweet shop from the entrance but upstairs they had full on restaurant! It was on the main road. Of course, it took us a while until I had to mobilize everybody to get active in table grabbing ☺, we lost few tables while waiting politely at a corner... But the food was good; most of us had the Southern special thali. After the food, we also went to Devaraj road. We walked up the road, Agnieszka looked in every Bata store to find her size in those pink plastic shoes but no luck… We went into a store to try Shalwer Kamez… I tried many of them but did not really warmed up to any of them; I was also hoping that Lokesh could make me something with the cotton sari I go. After all, we crashed at the Coffee day at the top of Devaraj road…
Yesterday’s led class was fine. I felt a bit stiffer in my knees. I blamed it to the Indian food; too much garlic… I do not know if it is really relevant. After the led class, we went to Bird sanctuary, which is a bit outside of Mysore. It was really beautiful. We took a boat ride in the river. It began raining in the middle of it but it was not pouring so that was fine. We also saw some alligators in the river other than birds… After the boat ride, we walked a bit, but the walk path is really short so we were done pretty quickly. Then we got back to Mysore, stopped at the Green Leaf to eat more Indian food…
There was also conference yesterday. Sharath talked about Ashtanga Yoga having the whole package with drishti, breathe, bandhas and asanas… when we do all these then we are doing meditation, pranayama and asana… I asked about whether putting contact lenses during practice or not and he said do whatever you want… So I will keep on wearing them. If he told us that not wearing them is better for the eyes or something then I would try without but if it does not matter I do not want to give away from my balance…
Today was fine. Practice was good. This time no new asana… Sharath began standing in front of me as I began my back bends until I finished my backdrops so he could help with the grabbing the ankles…
For breakfast, I went to Vivien’s with Agni. Today is Agnieszka's last day; she is leaving tonight ☹
Today was also the first day of Ken’s4-day Anatomy class. This first class was very good; Ken knows what he is talking about and he is very articulate…
Tomorrow is a full moon so no practice… I am thinking of seeing Dr. Kumar in the city for a consultation. I feel that my digestion is sluggish; maybe he can help in some way…
By the way, the sari I got turn out to be mixed with synthetic so after washing it did not softened up, so Lokesh does not want to make any clothing with it, instead he will make curtains for my new home. That also works out for me.
Yesterday’s led class was fine. I felt a bit stiffer in my knees. I blamed it to the Indian food; too much garlic… I do not know if it is really relevant. After the led class, we went to Bird sanctuary, which is a bit outside of Mysore. It was really beautiful. We took a boat ride in the river. It began raining in the middle of it but it was not pouring so that was fine. We also saw some alligators in the river other than birds… After the boat ride, we walked a bit, but the walk path is really short so we were done pretty quickly. Then we got back to Mysore, stopped at the Green Leaf to eat more Indian food…
There was also conference yesterday. Sharath talked about Ashtanga Yoga having the whole package with drishti, breathe, bandhas and asanas… when we do all these then we are doing meditation, pranayama and asana… I asked about whether putting contact lenses during practice or not and he said do whatever you want… So I will keep on wearing them. If he told us that not wearing them is better for the eyes or something then I would try without but if it does not matter I do not want to give away from my balance…
Today was fine. Practice was good. This time no new asana… Sharath began standing in front of me as I began my back bends until I finished my backdrops so he could help with the grabbing the ankles…
For breakfast, I went to Vivien’s with Agni. Today is Agnieszka's last day; she is leaving tonight ☹
Today was also the first day of Ken’s4-day Anatomy class. This first class was very good; Ken knows what he is talking about and he is very articulate…
Tomorrow is a full moon so no practice… I am thinking of seeing Dr. Kumar in the city for a consultation. I feel that my digestion is sluggish; maybe he can help in some way…
By the way, the sari I got turn out to be mixed with synthetic so after washing it did not softened up, so Lokesh does not want to make any clothing with it, instead he will make curtains for my new home. That also works out for me.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Lake trip after led class
Therefore, I moved to a room at chocolate lady, Gita’s house. I stayed at her house the first time I was here and I know it is clean and quiet. I am staying in the same room I stayed before, the upstairs room and Agni is staying in the downstairs room but she will leave on Monday ☹ I am comfortable now… since I am not staying so long, only until November 14th, I did not bother to look around much.
This morning, before the led class, Sharath told us that people who come to self practice until 6:15 (so that includes me) should come to 4:45 led class on Friday and on Sundays there will be a second led primary series class and also there will be a second led primary series on Sundays and up to 6:15 students has to come to the first batch… Then he left and the Saraswati led us through the led class. I was feeling tired so I was no full power…
After class and doing some laundry at home, I went to breakfast at Vivien’s. I really like her coffee and the fruit salad was the best one I had so far because it had chikoo! Then I, Agni, Dagmar and Claudia went to Karanchi Lake. First we took one those paddle boats to go around in the lake, it was fun. Indian boys who also rented boats were targeting us and driving toward us but we avoided any crash. The nature was beautiful by the lake. After the boat, we took a walk around it and many photos!
This morning, before the led class, Sharath told us that people who come to self practice until 6:15 (so that includes me) should come to 4:45 led class on Friday and on Sundays there will be a second led primary series class and also there will be a second led primary series on Sundays and up to 6:15 students has to come to the first batch… Then he left and the Saraswati led us through the led class. I was feeling tired so I was no full power…
After class and doing some laundry at home, I went to breakfast at Vivien’s. I really like her coffee and the fruit salad was the best one I had so far because it had chikoo! Then I, Agni, Dagmar and Claudia went to Karanchi Lake. First we took one those paddle boats to go around in the lake, it was fun. Indian boys who also rented boats were targeting us and driving toward us but we avoided any crash. The nature was beautiful by the lake. After the boat, we took a walk around it and many photos!
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