Headstands, free-floating!

On Tuesday, I asked Carry how do to do headstands without leaning against the wall. She said just try and performed a headstand in a beautiful and smooth way… so my turn to try, I got my legs up and then flipped like a fish to the other side! No worries! I am still one peace and did not really got hurt… Of course she wanted me to try again and I did, this time without the fish trick for few breaths first my knees band and then legs straight… On Wednesday, I tried by myself without much success… I was not really expecting free-floating headstands to be so much difficult than the ones against the wall… After the practice, I realized my first problem is not knowing which muscles to focus on. Today, I managed to get up with bended knees, so I figured that I am supposed to focus on my arms/shoulders and abdominals (well no-brainer right? We are doing ashtanga daaa! of course bandhas…) but I was too afraid to straighten my legs because of flipping fish action I have… Carry came to my help, and straightened my legs, so stayed up for about 10 breaths. However, when she tried to adjust my legs more, I could not go along with it and this is because I still have no idea/sense of whether I am going back or forth when she adjusts me… and fear of my fish action just makes me panic and fall off… Well, I guess I will figure it out at some point down along the road… wish me good luck!