Back to the real life… I began teaching last Sunday with a led class. My friend’s teacher trainees are coming to my classes and they are lovely. They are very eager to learn, to practice… They really immerse themselves. I am really enjoying teaching them and I really enjoy the full room. Also, living close to the shala is so convenient. I wake up just before 4 o’clock; I go to the shala to do my own practice before they start dropping in one by one around 7 AM. My practice is too long, so I do my finishing postures after I finish teaching, which is not so illogical, kind of logical. Still, I had to cut it a bit shorter for the last few days, I skipped last few postures of the primary, so I could go on and work on the problematic second series postures of mine, especially the famous Bakasana B! By the way, since I came back, handstands are not frustrating and scary, I can at least again kick with one foot up the wall which became impossible when I was in Goa (all mind issues). Moreover, now I found this new thing: from handstands I bend the knees and begin drawing my knees to my chest, trying to balance, kind of coming to Bakasana B, trying to get the feeling… not bad ha! Starting to get innovative, I guess I can say that I am doing some work.
Besides Mysore classes, I also teach beginners and intermediate led ashtanga classes 3 times a week. Those are nice to have as well, especially beginner’s class, so I can introduce new students to Mysore classes through it…
But of course I have some issues… the one I have to deal with now is making myself clear, believing in myself, in my own opinions, not constantly compromising, and having integrity towards myself... It is obvious, very obvious that I let myself led by others way too much, more than I am actually comfortable with. It is again the strength issue like the one I have with my handstands, Bakasana B. I have to learn to say no. This has been an issue since last year and actually the year before. It is not with everyone of course, it is with certain characters… first it was my sister, still she is some of the times too much, then now with another friend. It is for sure with people I really love, I care about; therefore, it is much more difficult to be definite with what I want. Well, I can also be strong and controlling. It seems like I swing between the two ends of pendulum. Ohh life let me grow and shine with strength, truth, honesty and big heart.
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