Guruji affect

This morning, I practiced right in front of Guruji’s office and next to the wall. The wall made things a bit tough sometimes but still it was great. I was surrounded with men so there was lots of male energy around me, but in a good way, just strong energy. During Prasarita Padottanasana C Guruji came and said “head down, hands down”. It was funny because my hands were hitting against the wall and I was trying to move a bit back so I can get down… At the end, during backbends, Guruji came and began waiting in front of me. After the third one, he gently pulled me up and made me do three back drops one after another and three back&forths and the last back drop with moving hands in, each time saying “exhaaal”. They were intense and deep and great! After practice, when I went to pay my respects to Guruji, he asked me “where are you from?” I said “Turkiye, Turkey”, he said in a bit confused way “Turkey?” I guess he does not get many students from Turkey. So I said “I was in London for a year and my teacher was Cary Perkins”, then he said “one year?” well, it has not been a whole year since I began practicing Mysore style and unfortunately I could not practice for a whole year with Cary but I was in London for a year so I said “yes” and left…
So far, practice in the shala has been very inspiring, energizing! I really appreciate this opportunity and I really believe it will bring out what I have inside and improve my practice. The only bummer is that the shala is closed for 12 days at the end of December. What to do, what to do?? Got a decide.
One last note; I still have moments of “What the hell I am doing here”, especially when I go to bed at night. I guess one reason for that is, I still cannot let go this other very busy world and be here wholly and some other reasons as well…