From Pune back to Goa and then Istanbul...

I have not written for ages, yes literally for ages… After I left Goa for Pune, for three months I did not have much of a breather… I did the 3 month long Work as meditation residential program at the Osho Commune in Pune. I thought I would not last longer than a month but I survived through out the whole 3 months… First I was working at the Welcome Center which was quite stressful… the only advantage was seeing the cute guys before anyone else since they had to go through us to enter to the commune ☺ While working at the welcome center, I did not feel like talking at all after work or during my breaks. I had the silent patch handy for the most of the time… But after 3 weeks, they moved me to Basho, the pool area where I spent the rest of my training working at the kiosk. That was much better; the nature, the pool, having music… I also began teaching yoga three mornings a week. Teaching went really well, people were very happy with my teaching. Sometimes there would be 20 or more students; I have never seen yoga being that popular in the commune besides me never having taught that many people before… First, I was teaching in a more Tias way but then I decided to teach ashtanga. Sometimes I had to modify according to the needs of the students, then it would be teaching led class based on ashtanga.
On the other hand, while working at Basho… all the issues I had to face, actually exploded on my face… I was really exposed meaning that I had to interact with people all the time (in a different way than Welcome Center), sometimes that would be very overwhelming; the boys who would hang out by the kiosk forever, while I was stuck there… I had to learn to be more assertive; still I am not sure if I have really learned it… I faced a lot of stuff about myself. It was very challenging sometimes and then it was very easy going some other times… Mainly, this time it was my issues regarding men… At the end, I left the commune by the end of March feeling a bit hurt, a bit frustrated. I thought that most people were vain and there was hardly any love in the whole place… everyone was after one think… I gave away all my robes declaring that I will never come back to this place. However, nothing changed regarding my devotion to Osho if not it is growing bigger…
I was supposed to go to Rishikes after Pune according to my plans but I ended up going back to Goa to study with Rolf for another month. I promised myself to learn how to ride the scooter and hopped into the sleeper bus on March 27th from in front of the German Bakery. My friend Divya fare welled me and then I was on my way to south. When I arrived to Goa I felt so good, it was green around and the air was breathable. And then meeting my friends… some were the ones that I met back in December. They went to Mysore and then came back to Goa to study with Rolf again. Going back to practice with Rolf was great after lonely practices in my room at the commune… Then, Goa began getting really hot and also empty. By the end of April, there were so few foreigners and all the shacks and shops began to be taken apart. I stayed until Rolf stopped teaching at the very last day of April. At the end, we were 5-6 people practicing with him and that was such a great opportunity, having so much help and attention from Rolf! He moved my practice quite a bit; the last day, he gave me Eka Pada Sirsasana of course with going in and going out to the pose.
The funny think is I had to continue dealing with similar issues iwhen I got back to Goa as I did in Pune… what to do… this was what India chose this time for me to work on, so I gave in…
Now, I look back and think that it was like everywhere in the Osho commune but a bit clearer, a bit less hidden. This place is where you see everything very clearly with all its beauty and ugliness. Yes, people can be vain everywhere and this is just much more obvious in the commune, even one’s own vainness… And no matter what, it is still a buddha field… But I guess I will give it a break for a while, and not visit Pune when I go to India next season.
So, I got back to Istanbul in the beginning of May after not knowing what I was going to do next. I was debating between going out to renew my visa to go to Mysore and going back home, so I could come back for Rolf next season. Then, my friends who own the coolest shala in Istanbul asked me to teach Mysore classes in their school. Therefore, it was decided for me to go back. I stayed in Bombay for a couple of days before heading back. After reading Shantaram, it was fun to be in Bombay. I was looking everything with the idea I got from the book. Of course I stayed at Coloba district! I actually liked the city, I can imagine living there.
Now it is Istanbul… I will begin teaching next Monday. I am very excited and at the same time I am very nervous… cross your fingers for me!